


cut my heart open

by ultravires



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:20:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28406163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ultravires/pseuds/ultravires
Summary: Jeonghan experienced a panic attack, almost asked Seungcheol to be his boyfriend, won third place, and faints— all in one night but not necessarily in that order.
Relationships: Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Yoon Jeonghan
Kudos: 20





	cut my heart open

**Author's Note:**

> dedicated to mba inj my support system and beta reader ily <3 part of teen age on twt. the english version of [this oneshot](https://write.as/ultravires/act-2-scene-2). title from [Oscar — H1GHR MUSIC](https://open.spotify.com/track/0kadepsX8OZNS4iPw7z1Yb).

The auditorium where the closing is held is getting more packed by the minute. Students of all faculties swarming around, loudly chatting and taking pictures and mingling, while a pop song is playing through the speakers. There are booths of food and beverages too outside, although they're not allowed to bring it inside.

SVT won, third place. A downgrade from last year's champion, but it's okay because this year they get best director and a new category called best original soundtrack and it's rewarding enough to see the tears of joy flowing freely from both the overly emotional Soonyoung and barely emotional Jihoon. In the short time Jeonghan has gotten to know the two closely, he thinks they're the weirdest couple he's ever met, but they work together. He has heard Soonyoung referring to Jihoon as his ‘work husband’ many times, to which Jihoon only reacted with a frown on his face or a scrunch of his nose, but he never objected to it. Jeonghan thinks it's cute, this odd love-hate chemistry they've got.

"I love you guys! I love you guys so, so much," Soonyoung blubbered, hot tears still streaming down his cheeks, wiping snot on his sleeve. 

Junhui is next to him, rubbing his back in soothing circles, even though he's also crying. Mingyu is holding the trophy, Seokmin and Minghao clamoring on his sides. Chan is hugging his brother so hard, saying loudly to anyone who will listen that "my brother made the best original soundtrack in this competition!" Jihoon looks like he'll die of embarrassment but there's a small smile on his tear-stained face. 

"You lead us to victory, you deserve this," Seungcheol wraps a hand around Soonyoung's shoulders, shaking it enthusiastically. Soonyoung bursts into a fresh round of tears and everyone crowds around him instead, hugging and trying to comfort him.

They take pictures afterwards, like they did after the screening. Jeonghan tries to savor this moment as much as possible, watching the twelve people around him joking around and laughing, which he realizes may as well be the last moment they're going to have together.

Jeonghan didn't even realize that he's crying until a finger wipes his cheeks and it comes away wet. Startled, he turns to see Seungcheol standing next to him, smiling softly. Jeonghan lays his head on Seungcheol's shoulder, who tucks him in close to his side. 

"I'm gonna miss this," Jeonghan says. "Seeing all of us together like this."

"Me too," Seungcheol answers. "These kids... They're my kids."

Jeonghan chuckles. "They are. You're their dad. You raised them, kind of. You taught them a lot."

"I hope so," Seungcheol breathes out, "I also learned a lot from them. And you, too."

"Oh?" Jeonghan raises his head from Seungcheol's shoulder to throw him a teasing glance. "Really? You learned from me? And what exactly did you learn from this nobody called Yoon Jeonghan?"

"I learned that some people just needs to be loved the way they're meant to be loved. And that it's hard to let someone in, see the real you, but it's a really brave thing to do."

Jeonghan supposes it is, since Seungcheol is such a soft and encouraging person to open up to. But because he has a tendency for self-sabotaging, instead of agreeing, what comes out of Jeonghan's mouth is, "Do you know I can easily break your heart?"

Seungcheol's hand doesn't leave from where it is still wrapped around his shoulder. "Yep."

"Then why are you still with me?"

"Because yours will break if I leave, and we could save all the heartbreak by staying together."

The way Seungcheol said it, 'staying together', like he's so sure they're going to work. The two of them. And how dare he say that Jeonghan's heart would break if he leaves? Yoon Jeonghan doesn't get his heart broken; he breaks hearts. Looking back, it may have not been the most honorable thing to do, but it protects him. It protects him from reliving past traumas, trusting people, especially when said people screwed him right over his head.

"Maybe we should."

"Should what?"

Jeonghan shrugs, trying to stay calm despite the hammering in his chest. He's really doing this. He's going to ask Seungcheol to be his boyfriend. "Stay toge—"

Before Jeonghan can finish his sentence, a bunch of Seungcheol's kids come bounding up to them.

"Hey! Some of us are going to get some food outside, you guys coming with?" Mingyu says, Wonwoo, Jihoon, and Soonyoung following behind him. In an instance, the moment between the two of them is shattered, and Jeonghan has to blink himself out of the stupor without jumping out of Seungcheol's hold startledly.

"Someone's gotta rehydrate this one after all the waterworks," Jihoon holds up his hand that is intertwined with Soonyoung's who got a blinding grin on his face. Jeonghan's heart warms up at the sight of it.

"You hungry?" Seungcheol turns to him, asking. Still too tongue-tied to answer, Jeonghan shakes his head, ignoring the twist in his stomach. Seungcheol grins apologetically to his kids. "Sorry guys, maybe later? Soonyoung, drink lots of water! You might need to cry some more during Day6."

Both Soonyoung and Jihoon gave Seungcheol the middle finger as they're walking away while Mingyu and Wonwoo laugh, heading for the exit. "Wait, where are the others?" Seungcheol hollers after them.

"At the front, getting good spots before it got crowded," Wonwoo shouts back over his shoulder. Seungcheol yells out a "Thanks!" before the four boys exited the auditorium. It may be some time before they come back, because there is a no food and drink rule inside the auditorium. All the other kids are far away from them, already in front of the stage, so Jeonghan and Seungcheol will have some time alone.

"Sorry, what were you saying earlier?" Seungcheol asked, eyes full of curiosity.

Except that short moment of adrenaline Jeonghan felt coursing through him just moments ago is gone, replaced by fear and dread, scaring himself out of his mind for even insinuating what he did. So what he does is flash a smile, wraps his own hand around Seungcheol's waist, and guides them to where the rest of their friends are waiting.

When they have weaved through the growing throngs of people and reached their friends, Jisoo was the first one to recognize them. 

"Oi! Where have you guys been?" He asked, hair clinging to his forehead, beaming crazily at the two newcomers.

Jeonghan gestures vaguely to the area behind them. Near where the rest of the crew is standing, there’s also Seungcheol’s peer group, Baekho, Minki who is one of his close friends, Jonghyun, and Minhyun. They exchange pleasantries during the lull in the event rundown, and a new performer is introduced on stage, a mildly popular band from the neighboring faculty that Jeonghan has heard a lot about.

The thing about concerts and events and basically any other public affair is that there are crowds. And where there are crowds there will always be creeps who take advantage of girls who are not aware of their surroundings, or who dress like how they want to, or just girls who are literally minding their own business.

This one is no different.

In the heat of the performance, the crowd around them is starting to jump along to the music, chanting the lyrics of the song. That’s when Jeonghan sees it: there is a girl standing not far from him, just three people to his right, one row in front of him.

A guy next to her— Jeonghan feels panic bubbling up in him, that fear and dread is back but for entirely different reasons— has his hand ghosting on her back, drifting lower and lower and lower and she doesn't seem to know, doesn't realize what the guy is doing — Jeonghan doesn't know if the guy is her friend, or an acquaintance, or a stranger, but it doesn't matter because what Jeonghan is witnessing in front of him right now is an attempt of sexual harassment.

"Cheol—" Jeonghan whispers urgently, stuttering in anxiety. He can't take his eyes off the girl, scared that in the split second he does the guy will have done something. But he's frozen in fear in place. Please, someone has to see this!

Bile rises up to his throat. The anxiety is running rampant in his chest, spiking up, making it harder for him to think straight. Seungcheol didn't hear him earlier but Jeonghan cannot trust himself to open his mouth again in case he vomits instead.

He is scared shitless, out of his mind, he wants to warn someone, he needs someone to stop it. He grips Seungcheol's arms tightly, everything becomes much louder, please, _please_ someone, anyone, do _something_ —

And then, out of the blue, the guy is sprawled on the floor. 

"Dude what the fuck!" He shouts from the floor, struggling to stand. Jeonghan knows for a fact that he hasn't touched the girl, who looks just as shocked as he is, turning around to see the commotion behind her. Whoever knocked the guy off must have seen his attempt too.

It's not such a big commotion for the band to notice and stop the performance, or even anyone that isn't standing near them. Seungcheol's friend Baekho steps forward to the harasser, knuckle bruised, and with a scarily calm voice said, "If you think you can harass a girl without getting caught, the next thing you're going to have is a broken nose. And I can and will break your nose without breaking a sweat."

The guy’s cheekbone is starting to sport a nasty bruise and he looks angry, positively livid. He's already raising his fist to retaliate, but Baekho is quicker and way bigger and smarter, so he dodges just in time to twist the guy's arm.

"You really wanna do this here?" He asks, still twisting the arm.

" _Fuck_ , get off me, you bastard!"

"You're the bastard and I suggest you get out of here before I call on the committee to throw you out because you tried to harass a girl."

Minki surges forward, his smaller frame looking comical next to Baekho's muscular stature, but the look on his face shows the same fierceness.

"I have everything on video. Just get out," Minki says sassily, holding up his phone. 

Jeonghan honestly doesn't know if he did get the whole thing on cam or not, but it must have scared the guy enough for him to stomp away angrily. A few people, most likely his friends, trail behind him with their head hung low as if they were ashamed. Which, of course, they should be— they're friends with a creep and attempt harasser.

The crowd resumed as it did before the whole thing happened and Jeonghan is glad to see that Baekho doesn't outright point out the girl during the commotion. One of Seungcheol's other friends Minhyun waits for a moment before stepping up to the girl and says something to her lowly, to which she breaks down in tears and Minhyun is guiding her out of the crowd.

The adrenaline is only catching up to Jeonghan now, crashing in waves that he is not prepared to face. His grip on Seungcheol loosens and his head is getting lighter. The urge to vomit is slowly going away, but his legs are turning to jelly too and he quickly can't keep himself upright.

The last thing Jeonghan sees before he blacks out is Seungcheol's worried face coming into view.

**Author's Note:**

> once again kudos comments bookmarks all appreciated


End file.
